- Stevie: "Mr. Rose, I-I hope that someday I find someone who I can stand long enough to feel a little lost when they're not around."
- Johnny: "I'm exhausted. Eight days, Stevie. That's the longest we've gone without seeing each other. No matter where we were, and yeah, we've managed to keep it up for almost 40 years."
- ―Stevie Budd and Johnny Rose discussing Moira[src]
"The Crowening" is the first episode in the fifth season of Schitt's Creek. It is the fifty-third episode overall.
Moira is in Bosnia filming The Crows Have Eyes III: The Crowening, which she sees as her comeback into the public spotlight. The movie's director, Blaire, sees the project as schlock, just work to pay for his next vacation, especially as he has had some big budget studio movies as part of his recent resume. Moira has three options: quit and go home, try to convince Blair that they can make something substantial out of the project, or make the script changes on her own without Blair's approval. This overseas filming is the longest Johhny and Moira have ever been apart. With all this Moira-less time on his hands, Johnny goes on a tear trying to fix every little thing wrong at the motel, namely doing Roland's work. Can Johnny see that he is misdirecting his energies and in reality really misses his wife? And Alexis finds out that David has failed a relationship quiz in a women's magazine, while she passed it with flying colors. She states that one of the secrets of the strength of her and Ted's relationship is going on regular adventure dates, the next one on which she invites David as a double date. David has to convince Patrick to go on the date without telling him why. If David is able to do so, he may regret it in not remembering the adventure part.
- Eugene Levy as Johnny Rose
- Catherine O'Hara as Moira Rose
- Dan Levy as David Rose
- Annie Murphy as Alexis Rose
- Emily Hampshire as Stevie Budd
- Dustin Milligan as Ted Mullens
- Noah Reid as Patrick Brewer
- Sarah Levy as Twyla Sands
- Chris Elliott as Roland Schitt
- James Cade as Blaire